The role of women in India is difficult to identify or describe with an absolute level of certainty. It is dependent on a number of other factors including caste, religious faith and level of education. India is a country comprised of a population with strong regional alliances. Therefore, the status of women varies within each of these regions. There are many stereotypes that come to mind when considering the status of women in India. Many people immediately think of arranged marriages, child marriages or sati (an ancient custom where women burn themselves alive on their husband’s funeral pyre). However, the women of India today would most likely not discuss ancient customs or modern stereotypes when asked to reflect on their “place” in society. In fact, the opinion regarding the status of women would vary depending upon the social location of the respondent.
In order to explore the perceptions of status and the role of women, I chose to talk to two women who had grown up in India and later lived in another country. I interviewed my mother’s aunt and grandmother’s sister, Claire, and my mother, Geetha, for the purpose of constructing an oral history. Claire and Geetha are Indian women from Kerala, a state in Southwest India that has a strong matriarchal tradition. Both of these women were born into similar family, social and economic circumstances. Despite their similar backgrounds, they have different perspectives regarding the status and role of women today.
Claire

Claire was born in October of 1925, in Madras, India, the sixth of eleven girls. Only nine of the eleven children survived, all girls, and she was raised with her eight sisters all over India. Out of all of the children, Claire and her sister Cecelia (Cissy) who were the closest in age, spent the most time together and with their parents. Claire’s father worked for the British government prior to the War for Independence. Initially, Claire and Cissy were home schooled together by their mother. Using the curriculum her older daughters had in school, she educated her younger daughters so that they would have the same knowledge base when they began their formal education. The idea of becoming independent women was reinforced from an early age. Their mother told them, “you do not have any brothers, so you need to learn to be independent.”

Claire began her formal education when she was enrolled in the sixth standard at the local day school. She attended this school for two years and found that her mother had prepared her well. When she began the eighth standard, her father’s work involved more travel and she was enrolled in a boarding school in Trichnapoli, which is in southern India. Claire adjusted well to boarding school, partly because her older sisters were already studying there. The school was a British run, convent boarding school. The curriculum was British centered and Claire found boarding school to be an enjoyable experience. She remained here until she graduated from high school.

After high school, Claire enrolled in Queen Mary’s College in Madras, India. Her college course work consisted of a number of subjects including English, French and natural science. Claire had to decide, in her final year, what type of career she would like to pursue. At the time, she felt that she had two options; education or nursing. Nursing was not perceived as a high-class profession, so Claire opted to become a teacher. Once she had chosen education, she took a few classes in education theory and child psychology. She graduated from Queen Mary’s College with a bachelors degree in Geography. After graduation, Claire began her first job at Rosary School, a convent school in Madras. At Rosary School, Claire was a sixth standard English teacher for the next twp years, until May of 1948.

On April 27, 1949, she met Urumese, who would eventually become her husband. Urumese worked for the British government as a foreign affairs ambassador. At the time he was stationed in Singapore and returned to India on a one-month leave. His parents had arranged for Urumese to meet three girls as possible brides. He met Claire and decided that this was the woman he wanted to marry. Once Claire also agreed to the marriage, the families began to plan the wedding.

One month later Claire saw Urumese for the second time, at their wedding. They were married in Madras on May 23, 1949. One short month later, Claire left her job and family to move with Urumese to Delhi, where his office in India was located. Claire took up a teaching position in a private school and began to make a home for them. Urumese commuted between Singapore and India for the first year of marriage. Claire remembers vividly that when they first moved to Delhi, they had no electricity in their apartment. Urumese told her that because she was an “educated woman” it should be no trouble for her to find out how to get the electricity connected. So, the very next day she set out, in an unfamiliar city with an unfamiliar language, to get the connection. It took her a few days to navigate Delhi, without being fluent in the native language of Hindi, but eventually they did receive their electricity connection! Claire and Urumese spent the first five years of their marriage happily living and working together in Delhi.
As an ambassador, Urumese’s work took him all over the world. After working for a few years, Claire left her job to travel with him. They were in Hong Kong when their first daughter, Nimi, was born. Unlike her own birth, Claire delivered Nimi in what she describes as a “very sanitized” hospital room. Claire was by herself for the lengthy labor that lasted for three days. No one from her family was able to make the trip to be with her for the birth of her first child, as was customary in the Paul family. Claire, Urumese and Nimi lived in Hong Kong for a few more years, while she learned how to care for a newborn. Due to his government position, their accommodations were luxurious and Claire had servants to help her with the household duties so she could focus on Nimi. Two years later they moved to Peking, Beijing where her second daughter, Priya, was born. Claire describes Priya’s natural birth as a painful experience. She says the only aspect she clearly recalls was being “conscious of the intense relief” when it was over.

For the first few years of Priya’s life, Claire gave up her professional duties to concentrate on raising the children. She had a formidable task on her hands because during these first few years the family lived, all over the world, in Peking, Washington, Singapore and Ottawa before returning and settling in Delhi. It was when the Parambi family returned to Delhi that Claire was able to balance her household and professional duties.

Nimi and Priya began school when the family returned to Delhi. All three were at the Jesus and Mary Day School, Nimi and Priya as students and Claire as a geography and English teacher. One of her first projects was when she decided to formalize the Parent-Teacher Association. She stayed as a teacher for the next ten years while working on a Masters in English Education. She had found her niche as an educator when a local company, Mahavika Rye, approached her to start a school for the children of their employees. This project began with an announcement in the paper, “School run by the well-known Mrs. Claire, looking for teachers and students.” Her school began with just 250 students and had expanded to 2,500 by the time she retired in 1994. Claire was forced to take breaks from developing her professional life, but was able to sustain a personally and intellectually satisfying career. In 1994, Claire chose to leave India and moved to Buffalo, New York to live with her daughter, Priya and son-in-law, Michael. She continues to do volunteer work at a local adult day care center where she organizes the social activities and arts and crafts projects.

When I asked Claire to reflect on the idea of women’s rights in India and in comparison to the other countries where she lived, she did not feel that women in India were stifled in their career or academic opportunities. She does mention that women had only two career options, but because she was interested in education, she did not feel limited. There were many more middle class women working when she was beginning her career, the idea of a “society girl” was diminishing at that time. She also mentioned that in relation her sisters, she was in the middle of the spectrum in terms of her feminist leanings. If I wanted to talk to a real feminist, I should speak with her sister Margaret! Claire is an example of one woman who was able to balance a successful career and a rewarding life as a homemaker.

Geetha

Geetha was born to Teresa and Mathew on December 16, 1950 in Madras, India. She was the second of five children and the oldest girl. As was the custom in India, Teresa returned to her mother’s home and Geetha was born in a hospital close to her grandmother’s home. As a child, Geetha traveled with her family throughout India. Her father was a dairy scientist for the newly liberated Indian government so the family moved when his work demanded it. Geetha and her family lived in Bangalore, Karnal, Madras, Karnal and finally Delhi. Geetha attended school for the first time when the Paul family lived in Karnal. The school in Karnal was similar to that of the one-room schoolhouses found during the 1800s in the United States. In Karnal, her class was made up of ten students who used tablets and ink-dipped quills for their schoolwork. The language of instruction was Hindi. The Paul family primarily spoke English at home, but the effects of school were so profound, Geetha forgot much of her English during this time.

When Geetha was ten years old, Teresa (Geetha’s mother) decided to attend medical school. At the time it was extremely competitive for women to find a residency program in India, so Teresa went to Scotland to complete her medical degree. Geetha and her three sisters, Meera, Rani and Sheila, the youngest at age 4, were sent to a boarding school in Simla. While in Simla, located in the foothills of the Himalayas, Geetha was educated by nuns who used British-centered curriculum in the newly independent India. She studied a wide variety of subjects, her favorites being biology, physics, math, english and singing. She recalled that the only subject that she did not enjoy was chemistry. It was an intense and rigid schedule where the students were allowed only one hour of recreation each day. Even this hour of recreation was closely supervised; this was the time when the girls had the music instruction. They were given free time on Sundays after they had attended morning mass. On these days, Geetha spent most of her time roaming the hillside with her friends, going to movies and dancing. Geetha regards her schooling in Simla as a “very rich and widely varied” educational experience. I asked her to compare her early education to the education her children received in another country. Geetha feels that the math instruction in India was superior to what her children were studying. With the exception of math, Geetha thinks that the American education tends to be a richer experience with more emphasis on studying independently and drawing on greater resources.

After six years at boarding school Geetha and her sisters moved home to Bombay. Her mother had graduated from medical school and was working in Bombay where her father had been stationed. Geetha had completed high school in Simla in December of 1966. In June of 1967, she began her college career at Sophia College in Bombay. Similar to the boarding school in Simla, Sophia College was run by nuns and was exclusively girls. For her first few years, Geetha focused on history and English classes. There were several occupational options available to women from her socio-economic background in India at the time. Students could choose from medicine, engineering or finance. Geetha had ruled out the possibility of going into medicine and in her third year, she chose to focus on economics.

In addition to her classes, her college career also included social work and political activism. The thing that Geetha recalls most vividly from her college days were the trips she took with other students to rural Indian villages. They would go every other weekend to do social work with the villagers. They did a wide range of activities from discussing and implementing new methods of farming to trying to educate and improve hygiene. As a junior, Geetha participated in a gherao (sit-in) at the Dean’s office, much to the horror of her parents. Today, she cannot recall the impetus for the sit-in, merely that she enjoyed taking part. After completing a Bachelors degree in Economics, Geetha continued on to graduate school to pursue a Masters in Economics. Upon graduation, Geetha started her first job as an economist in an association of banks.

Geetha had been working for two years when her focus shifted slightly from her professional career to her personal life. While working at Vijaya Bank in Bombay, Geetha met Vijay, who she would eventually marry. They began dating in 1973 and were engaged by August of 1974. Geetha had been raised as a Catholic and Vijay was from a traditional Hindu family.

Vijay’s family belongs to a particular sect of Hinduism, Iyengar Brahmins from Madras. Brahmins are the top tier of the Hindu caste system. An Iyengar is a specific group of Brahmins who worship Lord Vishnu. Vijay’s family also had connections with both the British and Indian government. Vijay was born and raised in Bombay, India. He had studied similar subjects to Geetha, that lead him to his job at Vijaya Bank.

Geetha and Vijay were married over three days in March of 1976. They had a Hindu and Catholic ceremony. Following the wedding, Geetha moved into her husband’s house in keeping with Indian tradition. At this time, Vijay lived in his childhood home with his mother and grandmother. In the initial stages of their marriage, the biggest adjustment Geetha had to make was the change in diet. There was no meat in her new home and Geetha was used to non-vegetarian diet. Eventually, Geetha adjusted to her new lifestyle and took the time to become acquainted with her husband’s mother, Kamala and grandmother, Namagiri. She learned about Hindu culture and learned to speak Tamil, a language spoken primarily in the south of India.

Geetha and Vijay had their first child, Aditi, in November of 1978. Similar to her mother, Geetha went to her parents’ home to give birth. Her mother was with her during the delivery. At this time, men were not permitted in the delivery room during birth, so her husband and father were having tea. Aditi was the first grandchild on her maternal side and the only grandchild in India on her paternal side, so there were plenty of people to care for her. Geetha returned to work shortly after the birth, but adjusted her work schedule so she would be at home when the baby was awake.

One year later, Geetha and Vijay decided to move to the Unites States. They decided to make this move for several reasons, but primarily to secure a future for their children where they would not be subject to religious discrimination. In May of 1980, they boarded a plane to Los Angeles where Vijay’s sister and family lived. Initially Vijay worked while Geetha stayed at home with Aditi. When Aditi started kindergarten, Geetha returned to work. In October of 1984, the Vijay family had their second child, a boy named Vikram. This childbirth experience Geetha notes was “similar to the first” except that her mother came to stay with her for the birth and first months of Vikram’s life.

After her mother returned to India, Geetha and Vijay had to make choices about the future of their family. Unlike the period following Aditi’s birth, Geetha and Vijay were the primary caregivers, so Geetha chose to stay at home and care for the children instead of returning to work. When Vikram turned five and began school, Geetha returned to work. She wanted to re-enter the working world and the family would greatly benefit from a second income. Geetha did not want to return to banking or finance. She tried several jobs, including starting her own company, but finally decided on a career in real estate. This was the perfect choice for Geetha because she was able to determine her hours, so she could be at home when her children returned home from school. She is a successful real estate agent today, in upstate New York, and reflects on how she probably would never entered the field if she had not taken time off for Vikram’s birth.

I asked Geetha to reflect on the status of women in India and compare that to what she sees in the United States. Contrary to the idea promoted by the media, Geetha feels that while treatment of women in India and their status in society can in some cases be considered “socially backward”, women are “professionally liberated.” Women and men are given ‘equal pay for equal work’ which is something women in America continue to struggle for. There is no stigma attached to the concept of a “women manager” which is something she noticed only upon arriving in the United States. Geetha feels that while it is accurate that women may sometimes struggle for legal rights in India, this is something she has never experienced herself. Academia and professional life in India seem to be more merit based and fewer allowances are made on the basis of gender. Here, at the turn of the twenty-first century, “India is becoming far less insular. There may not be an organized women’s movement, but change is certainly occurring and the media is a strong catalyst for this change.”

Claire and Geetha Meet Gerda Lerner

In The Creation of Feminist Consciousness Lerner provides a theoretical framework that proposes six elements that are essential to women’s intellectual and social development; self-authorization, economic independence, education, social space, maternal independence and women’s history. Lerner’s book looks at women from the Middle Ages, so some of these elements remain valid today, while in some cases, women have benefited from some that have already been realized. Of these six elements, education, economic independence and maternal independence are evident in the lives of both Claire and Geetha.

Throughout history, education has been a privilege granted to a few rather than a right for all people. The privilege of education often goes to the privileged classes before anyone else. Lerner documents the women who were afforded an education during the Middle Ages, they typically came from affluent families. This being said, for many Indian women born in the 1920s, even to educated and affluent families, education for women was still not a given. However, both Geetha and Claire were brought up to value education and it was assumed that both girls would attend college. Claire recalls her mother stressing the importance of education to secure her future. For them, education was closely tied to economic independence. Her mother felt that if her daughters were well educated they would have the ability to take care of themselves should that be necessary. She (Claire’s mother) wanted to make sure that each of her nine daughters would have the ability to care for themselves and their children and never have to be dependent on a man. Geetha felt that there were similar expectations in her household. The most notable example was the way in which her mother, Teresa, combined her career aspirations and family responsibilities. Teresa enrolled her children in boarding school while she went to Scotland to complete her medical degree. Geetha was raised to believe that the best thing she could do for herself was put the most into her schooling so that opportunities would be available to her.

In their (Claire’s) family, education and economic independence were and continue to be closely related. When Claire’s mother encouraged her economic independence, in the 1930s and 1940s, it was an extremely liberal and foreword thinking philosophy. However, to the Paul women, economic independence was exceedingly important and encouraged. They felt the way to secure this independence for women was through education, thus the emphasis of attending and completing graduate school. Urumese, Claire’s husband, was an international ambassador originally in the British government and then the Indian government.

There was never a financial need for Claire to work, as Urumese was able to support their family’s comfortable lifestyle. It was important to Claire, personally, to be able to work. She relished the satisfaction of teaching and having a productive career that spanned thirty years. Geetha’s family also does not have a financial need for her to work outside the home, as her husband is able to support the family. Through the course of her marriage, Geetha has spent time at home, working part time and working full time. Currently both of her children have left home, so she is free to pursue her career goals. She cherishes both her economic independence and her career. Geetha has nurtured these ideas in her children both explicitly and through her example. The life paths of Claire and Geetha are a clear reflection of the ideas that were nurtured in their households.

Motherhood as a means of self-authorization is another element of Lerner’s framework. Lerner describes the concept of motherhood in the following manner,

“Until marriage was no longer the chief means of support for most women and until large groups of women no longer needed to spend most of their lives as child-bearers and child-rearers, the main concept through which women could conceptualize their group identity was their common experience of motherhood (137).”

Lerner is suggesting that until women were able to gain access to other realms of society, for example academic and intellectual discourse, they needed to have other ways to relate to one another. While this statement could no longer be applied literally to most women today, many women may identify as professional women or as mothers or both. Geetha and Claire share an identity as professional women from affluent backgrounds who have made a conscious choice to work. They work fulltime without neglecting their familial duties. These familial duties can range from cooking and cleaning to attending parent-teacher conferences. It was evident that equal importance is placed on the fact that both of these women can identify as professional women and as mothers.

During the course of the interviews, the themes of the importance of education, economic and maternal independence were frequently addressed and consequently are the focus of the analysis. Thus, self-authorization, social space and women’s history are not addressed here. Lerner posits that self-authorization is a process women went through so that their work would be given a fair chance when evaluated, in most cases, by men. Sometimes this process of self-authorization involved a woman giving a man credit for her the work. Geetha and Claire were born at a time where the implicit message from their family was that women were equal to men, so they did not have to endure the process of self authorization. In The Creation of Feminist Consciousness, the social space referred to is a place where women could honestly discuss their intellectual ideas and works in a place where they would be evaluated based on their work rather than their gender.

Claire and Geetha are Catholic, upper class, Indian women who have different perspectives on the status of women. Despite similar educational backgrounds and socialization processes, their perception of the world was different. Perhaps this can be accounted for because they were born in different time periods, but this conversation led me to wonder what their reaction would be to the representation of Indian culture in social studies classrooms today? I wonder whether they would react in different ways if presented with a text such as Shabanu and then were asked to comment on its validity as a representation or even an introduction to Southeast Asian culture. Despite their obvious similarities they still differ in their respective outlooks, particularly in the societal role ascribed to Indian women. The process of constructing this oral history provided a glimpse into the roles, expectations and aspirations for themselves and their families of two Indian women.